So...the newest season of the Bachelor started tonight and this season, ABC is doing something different and promoting the Bach as The. Hottest. Bachelor. Ever. Of course I have to check this out - could he really be the hottest ever?
Same premise as always...same montage of clips to get introduced to Brad...the obligatory pics of our Bach as a child, tasting the luxuries of a wealthy childhood only to have it stolen away after his parents divorce. Being raised by his mom in a double-wide trailer (I never really understood what that meant), 'choosing' to work the oil rigs instead of going to college...ahem...and then owing a couple of bars with his brothers. Nice. And of course, he's from Texas.
Flash to the shots of Brad running down a beach (sans shirt, of course), strolling down a street in jeans and shirt, looking pensive and thinking about his future wife, showering (nice), and frying up some eggs (again, sans shirt, I mean, really). I'll admit that's he's a good looking guy. Potentially the hottest.bachelor.ever. He does have the sly sideways smirky-type grin that has been known to win me over in past...but I digress:
He and Chris have a little chat, a mano-a-mano if you will, before the ladies are introduced, where Brad's arm is craftily twisted by Chris to reluctantly admit that, yes, he is a self-made millionaire, but really, he's just looking for a wife who doesn't care about his money. Oh, Bach, you're so humble and sweet, and oh, you're a millionaire?
Bring on the ladies...my favourite part of the new season...meeting the girls and trying to imagine what I would be like if I were one of them. I'd like to imagine I'd be shy and demure and super witty and flirty and say all the right things. But part of me thinks I might have one too many wines and start wondering aloud about where 'my boobs' went. And really, for the average viewer, which is more entertaining? Poor Token Drunk Girl, I especially liked how after every rose he didn't give to her, the camera panned right to her face. I was pretty sure she was going to be chugging out of a bottle of wine during the Rose Ceremony. That would have the best.ceremony.ever.
So after the introductions, where Brad tries to 'steal a hug' from a few girls, and admits that this an 'amazing' experience, and he's so excited that he may have found his future wife, right here, tonight, we get the party started.
And it's the usual. Girls get wasted. Girls get catty. Girls steal the Bach away for their one-on-one time. Girls showing their webbed toes. Girls showing how flexible they are - I mean flxibl without an E, right Juli? Girls swimming in the pool - there's a nanny you probably wouldn't want hanging around your husband for too long. Girls doing a dance routine - I'll admit that is normally the kind of thing that I wouldn't like to see happen, but I like Jenni - she's a lot of fun, and an early favourite (and got the First.Impression.Rose), so we'll see. Girls who give the Bach a yellow rose, and instead of doing what I would do (and that is to ask him if he would accept the rose), singing the yellow rose of texas or whatever. I mean, puhlease. And yet Lindsey sticks around.
So I'm not quite sure if I like him or not. There's got to be something up with him. In the Rose Ceremony, he picks a few surprises, like the girl who won him over by sharing her story of how she 'broke her face' (what the ??) and Solisa, who I'm positive he kept around so that when his twin brother appears (I predict a week #3 appearance), the brother can confirm that yes, she's from Austin, and yes, they've 'dated'. We'll see what transpires over the season....the clips look equally predictable and entertaining (what? the girls fight and cry? someone gets hurt and is taken away in a helicopter/ambulance? and then, the bachelor faces his.toughest.decision.ever?). Oh, Chris Harrison, what will the next twist be, you sly host you.
Stay tuned for next week.
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