Finally the tables have turned. The Girls get to bring the Bach home to
meet their families. I do think, that in future seasons of the
Bachelor, that these dates should start with date boxes delivered to
Brad that are representative of his upcoming date and family
meet-n-greet. So...in that spirit:
The First Date Box Arrives: Brad gets a picnic basket, some red ruby
slippers, a mini-walker, and a bottle of shampoo. Brad is off to Kansas
to meet Jenni's family. The whole dance routine was a bit weird
(especially with no music), but overall, I think it was a successful
date. The family was nice. The grandma was fantastic - seriously, I
loved everything about her: the 100% grandma t-shirt, sitting on the
walker at the dinner table, the attitude, everything. She's gold. The
mom - not bad - but the hairwashing scene was a bit weird. Or, as Brad
put it, comfortable. The editors try to play up the whole long distance
relationship thing, but it's overblown: Jenni is an easy pick.
The Second Date Box Arrives: A 'Tickle Trunk' with a turquoise blue
boa, a crystal ball, and a life jacket. Oh yes, this is an entertaining
date. Sheena and Brad and their look-a-likes (Beverly and 'the dad') go
sailing. So far so good. But up next: Beverly is a nut. Very odd. But
no worries, Beverly and Sheena are ready to get married, so Brad has
nothing to worry about. I especially loved the hot tub scene - I really
thought I saw a shadow of a person walk behind the makeshift screen
behind the tub and I was convinced that Beverly would pop out, in a
turquoise bikini, matching kitten heels, and waterproof tarot cards,
and hop in the tub.
Sidebar: Do you ever imagine, when they show Brad and whatever girl
he's with in the back of the SUV, that Chris is actually the driver? I
mean, what else does he have to do this episode? The least he could do
is cart everyone around. But I digress....
The third date box arrives: An empty bottle of ouzo, with the label slightly peeled off and no cap. That's it.
I have to admit that I like DeAnna - clever editing. But I really liked
her and her family. The dad seems solid. And I really liked how DeAnna
brought her family photos out to show Brad pics of her mom - all
sarcasm aside, that was nice. Almost made me forget that I was watching
a reality show with a dude who was dating multiple girls at once.
Almost. I think DeAnna might deserve better - again, clever editing.
And holy crap, the grandpa! He literally struts in, with a harem of
broads (okay okay...his wife, daugter-in-law, and sister or something),
and announces that 'he's got the booze, he's ready to party'. Nice! The
rest of the date looks like fun and Brad gets a bit drunk.
The final date box arrives: a framed picture of Bettina's dad with his
arm around the ex-husband taken at some old boys club, and Bettina's
spine. Not much to say about this date - except that the dad looks a
bit like Stephen King to me and is a jerk. And a creep. And arrogant.
And that's just what he looks like on paper. I can't even joke about
this date - if this were my family, I would leave home and never come
back. This is not a family that loves each other. No wonder Bettina
can't think for herself - her dad has spoon fed her every thought she's
ever had.
Up next: The Bachelor faces his Easiest.Decision.Ever. How hard is it
to decide to get ride of Bettina? But wait a minute - wait a minute - I
don't have a professorship, Stephen King, so I need a minute to
comprehend - Bettina gets a rose??? Weak. The only thing I can think of
is that Brad has already made his final decision and he only wants to
take Betts on an overnight date to piss off the dad. Seriously - what
other explanation could there be?
Final sidebar: I liked Sheena, I really did - but how awesome would it
have been if, in the limo, when she's crying and such - that the camera
turns around towards the front, the window rolls down, and what? It's
our old friend Chris Harrison - working some OT as the limo driver -
chauffeur's hat and all. Again, if only I wrote the show.
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