Bachelorette, Eh? Episode Five: Tiptoe Through the Tulips

And then there were ten.  Great episode tonight, no?  And an even better preview for the rest of the season.  But we'll get to that later.  I think, since tonight's episode featured ten cats, that it's time to chat about each one.  Please weigh in with your own thoughts and to place your bets now for last cat standing.

In order of roses....

Michael.  Michael got tonight's first date card (Come Fly With Me, which made me think of Air Canada for some reason...is that an old slogan?).  Their date involved ziplining around Whistler (not the town, although that would be cool: ziplining from hotel to hotel above the crowds of people) and a champagne tasting.  The date went well - lots of fun balances with serious conversation - and Michael got a rose.  Despite my best intentions, I am really liking this cat.  He seems the most sincere and he's really growing on me. Granted, he's a bit goofy, but in a good way.  His best line tonight (to profess how much he likes Jillian): 'I could sit in a room with her and just eat spaghetti'.  Huh? 

Ed.  I think I liked Ed right from the start.  Let me put it out there by saying I respect and like Ed even more now.  That's right.  I think he made the right move by leaving the show. Whether it was truly for work reasons, I don't know or care.  I hope it doesn't come out later that he left because he's the one with the girlfriend and he used work as an excuse to wimp out and leave.  And I'm wondering if he gave her a good ole 'call me when the cat you pick at the end doesn't work out' line.  Because that is an article I wouldn't mind reading in People or US five months from now: Ed leaves the show only to reunite with Jill later. Golden.

Jesse.  My latest pick for Last Cat Standing, even though he's got a Chris O'Donnell look going on, and I keep thinking of that movie The Bachelor whenever I see him.  You know the one - where Chris O'Donnell leaves Renee Zellweger and they later reunite, I think. Everytime Chris thinks of marriage there are a crapload of horses chasing him.  If you've never seen the movie you're undoubtedly shaking your head right now, thinking I've lost it.  And you might be right.  But I do like Jesse.  Their date was fantastic - gorgeous views of the mountains from the ski plane.  The glacier part was a bit weak, but the dinner/drinks apres was quite lovely and romantic.  He was a bit evasive when she asked him whether it was too soon to get into another relationship, but I still think he'll be the Last Cat.

Reid.  This one was a bit of shocker.  I really thought he might get the axe.  And I really am starting to think he's got a secret in the form of a girlfriend.  There was something about his reaction when she asked him which guy has that girlfriend that I did not like. And he never really answered her, did he?  Just joked around?  Hmmmm....

Kiptyn.  Still a dark horse, but they do seem to have chemistry.  And you can't beat that stubble.  I've read a few internet spoilers that suggest Kiptyn might just stick around to place second or third and then 'become' the next Bachelor.  Wouldn't be the worst thing in the world, methinks, although we haven't learned enough about him yet.

Robby.  Fair choice for a rose, especially with his cute helmet head from snowmobiling. Not sure about him in the long run, but he's cute and charming.  We'll see how far he goes.

Jake.  My original choice for last cat standing but we're not seeing enough of him.  Who knows what the editing is doing but I still think he'll get far.

Tanner.  Another shocker.  Every time we saw him, he had that perma-fear look plastered on his face.  And all this time in Whistler - heavy wool socks and big winter boots - must be killing him and his fetish.

Wes.  Wes is probably one of those guys who the editors love: he says just enough crap to make him look like a jerk but who knows what he's really like behind the scenes. Regardless of his obvious publicity stunts, I don't think he has a girlfriend.  Not one that would let him wear that god-awful denim shirt with the red bandana patches anyhow. Kenny Chesney would never wear a shirt like that, I tell you.  He wouldn't wear a shirt at all, actually. And let me help him out here and end the mystery:  www.weshayden.com That's right y'all, his cd is available now.  They say love, it don't come eeeeeezzz-ay.

Mark.  No rose for Mark, but that's no surprise.  I'm still left wondering who the heck he is.  And I'm still missing Mike (who got the boot last time).  I did like Mike.  Sigh.

Coming up in the season:  Erectile Dysfunction Rears Its Ugly Head.  I kid you not, looks like someone can't perform during the overnight dates.  I can hardly wait to see Chris-Bot talk to Jillian about that one. Say goodbye to the poker face, Chris-Bot. My first guess on who the poor unfortunate cat is who..ahem...can't perform was Tanner, but I'm having a hard time believing he even makes it to the overnight dates...